Diverging paths

At supper with a fairly new acquaintance tonight, shockingly comfortable to talk with. Also the 4th Jon in my phonebook. How many Jonathans are there in the world?? Wait, don't answer that.

Somewhere in the midst of all that talk, he made a point that slammed home. We'd been talking about getting less comfortable with certain friends over time because of how individuals change over time, and he said, "You take different tracks and when they diverge far enough, you're not on the same wavelength anymore (sic)." (--> major sic, since I'm really bad at remembering exact words.)

And that completely hit me: it instantly brought to mind what Kelvin had said to his mother about why we broke up. His mum had told me he said we were going on different paths. While that occurred to me as utter bull at the time (and it probably largely still is, considering all the other things that pulled us apart), hearing it now from someone else's lips made me think there is some truth in that, whether or not Kel had truly meant it.

It hit me hard, though I couldn't show it, not in front of a person I was newly acquainted with.

On hindsight, we were indeed taking very different paths, seeing where I am right now and where he very likely is currently. And this divergence would likely have put distance between us eventually, perhaps even re-tune that wonderful wavelength that we shared so vividly and incomparably.

(I digress: Words are so inadequate for the concepts that zip through our minds, that we understand wordlessly. I feel helpless when I can't fully explain what I think, as now.)

But if he had still wanted what we had, that wouldn't have bothered me much. Distances can be forded with a little effort, if it means holding on to the rest of your life.

A pity, but no more than a pity. But damn, I'm still learning from this one.