Thursday, May 20, 2010

Not-so-final message

Last night, I was waiting for a mild migraine-cum-allergy-headache to ebb before going to sleep. I started stretching in bed, when a very sudden and intense pain blasted through my head. It felt like someone clamped on a really, really, really tight steel headband and kept tightening it. It slowly lowered in intensity but took residence in the right side of my head.

It was so sudden and unique in my experience that I was genuinely worried it was an aneurism. I was worried enough that I actually started typing a last message on my phone via the compose-SMS function so that someone might see it when they walked in in the morning and found me dead. And then, typical me, decided to play it safe and saved it under Drafts and re-opened it under the edit function so it could still be easily found and read without getting deleted accidentally, but without having to pay for sending it to someone. Anal retentive to the last, eh.

But anal retentiveness aside, what that did was make me think about who I wanted to say "I love you" to the most, and I've got my list down. I'm happy to say it's a good-sized list, and all of the people listed already know they're loved by me.

I also know what to say about my life at this moment, distilled down to three sentences. All three are good ones.

And, of course, I had to mention I'm a full organ donor, just in case my heart hadn't stopped yet when I was found.

I'm glad it isn't a final message after all. But I'm more glad about what it's made me think about.

I ended with a more pensive last thought, though.

1 comment:

Hamsterbaby said...

Wow you are that busy ? Havent Senn you on D2 for a Long Long time