I just ate a muffin. Feeling surprisingly full after, especially since I ate no lunch to speak of, unless you count a cup of carrot-and-apple juice and a few sips of soy milk. Was a nice-ish chocolate muffin...but then again, anything tastes great when you're hungry I suppose.
Am on a probably futile attempt to lose some weight before my friend's wedding next month. Haven't seen this group of friends for years, and the last time I met them was 5kg ago. Sigh, the ravages of time...and too much festive and holiday and stress-relief and PMS eating. Yeah, PMS really sends my appetite through the roof, and chocolate suddenly gives me meaning in life for a week each month.
Geez, I'm sounding like a weight-conscious neurotic. Sad but true that many of us are. Really worried when I grow older I'll get afflicted with stuff like diabetes, cardiovascular disease, die of angina at age 40, have half my bowels yanked out due to colorectal cancer, etc. Most of all, I'm worried that I'll have a waistline to rival Henry VIII's by the time I'm middle aged.
Funny, but that got me thinking about a silly poem I wrote when I was 11 about the ghost of a queen (I had been picturing Anne Boelyn while I was writing that). The teacher questioned me if I'd written that myself, the first of a string of teachers who asked me the same thing at various points in my academic life. It's kinda flattering on one hand, yet rather miff-ing on the other not to be trusted at the only thing I'm sure I'm good at.
1 comment:
First of all, I do enjoy reading your random ramblings. Secondly, I also think you're being very hard on yourself on the weight loss issue. Don't pile on extra feelings of guilt on top of your hunger - that's terrible and you don't deserve it. I'm a French kinda person -- I believe in enjoying good food and not depriving myself. Muffin once a month? Yes, I will.My favourite sundae once in 2 months - yes why not. Not depriving yourself doesnt mean being a pig or a first class glutton -- but in moderation like the French. You swing from extremes of fruit juice and soy milk and battle with hunger and deprivation and there's all this guilt. No more. From now on, savour and enjoy what you eat for life is short and food doesn't talk back to you.
Thirdly,as you enjoy that muffin or pizza or whatever,make sure you have enough nutrition to complement.Check what you ate. If you only had time for a muffin for lunch -- bring fruit from home or supermarket to finish the meal -- banana, apple, orange,anything to add to your daytime intake. Not getting enough protein? Buy a protein shake something....(P.S. cut bad carbs, increase protein, helps lose weight)
So be more loving on yourself. if you only ate 2 lettuce leaves for lunch, the last thing you deserve to do is feel bad about it. No, the time has come - enjoy your muffin or cake or whatever, but make sure you get all your nutrition. This is doing something for yourself -- like going to a spa for a day, or shopping for a gift for yourself -- there must be the element of enjoyment.
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